Goal Setting 2012:)

I haven't blogged in 5,000 years. But my kids are sleeping and I have had a few questions from close friends about how I structure/goal set. So, I'm just going to put it on here and send peeps here:) I have enjoyed reading through the blog. Most of the posts are when we were living in Louisville with only Calvin. We are in Glasgow now with two babies:)

Drew and I believe in goal setting. We run a pretty structured home. Makes life more predictable and easy for everyone (most of the time!)

Looking back at 2011:

I think it was a healing year for me in so many ways. (part of the reason I haven't blogged in a while. I don't want my personal struggle with grief out there for everyone:) Ask me personally and I'll talk for days:)

We had our second baby! Yay for Phillip Silas Krutza!!!! Our marriage grew. We are more in love than ever and seem to grow each year in understanding sacrificial, covenantal love. We are so thankful that God has graced us with each other. We watched as Calvin became a little man. We've hit our knees hard pleading for grace to parent a toddler in love and wisdom.

We have grown in grace and the gospel. We went to camp this year with our youth and heard JD Greear speak (sp?). We were so challenged to let go of the law that we so easily cling to and REST in Jesus...in our marriage, parenting, etc. We are still growing and will for the rest of our lives but...I could also talk for days here.

We bought a home. Tightened our budget to save more since we paid a down payment. I went back to teaching two classes. Cal has gone to preschool. God is good and I have actually enjoyed a little outing each day.

Looking ahead: ( I mean this is what I was planning on writing about.)

We're busy people and unless we set down together and set goals then we will not have anywhere to aim.

We break our goals into categories: Spirtual (individual), marriage, parenting, giving/serving, saving, and health. Everyone does this differently!

I'm going to share a few (some are not really open to share with everyone;)

Spiritual (Mine)

Our church is reading through the Bible in a year. We want to do this too:)

Read 1 other book a month. (I have a list...too long.) I have read Family Worship and I'm reading through Worship Matters now;)

Marriage

Sunday night study together. Our Bible plan has a day off on Sunday night. We will read a book out loud together. Usually a marriage book---Driscoll, Piper- married peoples books;)

Monthly date night

5 year anniversary trip:):):)

BOYS

Date night once a quarter.

Nightly prayer, Bible Study, singing time.

Continue catechisms and scripture memory.

Committed to being home 3 nights a week-trying 4 but we know that won't happen each week.

we also have some for each one of them. Since Cal's reflect a few issues we are having I will protect his little privacy:)

GIVING/SERVING

Tithe

Continue Compassion Child-consider a few extras.

Fund 2 "special needs"

Mission trips

others involve church stuff;)

SAVING

Car

A specific dollar amount

Open me a IRA

Health

Cut white sugar, flour

Exercise-a specific goal

I keep these in a folder right below our calendar. We review them each month. I also transfer onto a monthly sheet that gets posted on the fridge right next to this weeks menu. It's all hand written and in my own lingo:) Works different for everyone but I really do believe specific goals set your mind on being disciplined by God's grace. We don't freak out when we dont meet a goal. But we desire to live simply and intentionally.

I can't believe I just had time to write a blog post!

Happy Birthday Buddy.

Isaiah,

In 5 days, it's your birthday. I missed you at Thanksgiving and Christmas. It really wasn't the same without you. I really miss you this week. I always loved your birthday parties. I loved buying you presents and watching you open them. I miss the way you loved balloons. I'm so sad that next Tuesday we will gather together to celebrate your life but we won't be watching your face light up as we sing Happy Birthday to you. I miss you especially this week as I think about the would be six year old nephew that I long to hold. I'm so thankful for your life and I know this year is really your best birthday yet. I know that instead of your family singing to you that you are joining with the saints praising your Creator. I know your grave speaks a false reality and that you are more alive than you have ever been. I know that you don't desire balloons, fire trucks, guitars, your lab puppy, or even your lion because you stand in the presence of our beautiful Jesus and you are fully satisfied and complete.

We will remember you buddy. I promise to tell Calvin and Silas about you. I promise to love on your brother with all of my might. I will hug your parents, grandparents, and Jessie as we remember the most special boy I have ever known. I know you don't miss us but I sure miss you. Life without you is harder than any of us had imagined. But we will live and hope in the Jesus that you now see face to face. And we will remember all the special moments we had with you.

With all my love,

Aunt Amanda

Shutterfly Christmas Cards

Every year since I married Drew, I've been interested in sending out Christmas cards.


But you know how it is. Good intentions don't get things done.


Thankfully, sometimes good deals are all the motivation I need to get a task accomplished. So this year, provided this works out, a few of our nearest and dearest will receive a card and photo from our family of five.


Photo cards are so much more personal than typical greeting cards. And who doesn't want little our boys' faces on their refrigerators for a couple of weeks during the holidays? It would make me smile!


Shutterfly's website makes it easy to find and create a design, even for people like me who don't know how to do lots of snazzy things on the computer. And now there's a promotion to get 50 free Christmas cards, so I'm definitely due to order some!


The only problem with these promotions is that they get me shopping... A few items I've browsed include:

· Christmas cards http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-cards

· holiday cards http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/holiday-cards

· Christmas photo cards http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-photo-cards

· personalized mugs http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-gifts/photo-mugs

· birthday party cards http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/birthday-cards-stationery

· holiday invitations http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-invitations

· And lots of cool products from their Cards & Stationery page

The mug is an especially tempting purchase since I have lots of coffee lovers in my family... my mom's husband, my mother-in-law... and if I get them one, how could I resist getting Gabe one for work too? I may just have to do that.
But I better start with the promotional deal and see where I go from there. Get excited--you may find something cute in your mailbox in the next few weeks!

If you're a blogger, you can find out how to get 50 free Christmas cards here.

I stand amazed

Currently, I am sitting in my lawn chair in the front yard;)  Soaking in the sun and typing a blog.  Cal and I just got back from a little run and he is sleeping(good boy.)  Being a stay at home mommy has it's perks.  

We are nearing the first birthday of our little man.  A year ago today, I went to the doctor and was pretty discouraged b/c I was a week overdue!!  The doctor wanted to induce today(a year ago.)  I begged for one more week.  I was a hugely fate preggo lady and I was having to deal with annoying 8th graders.  Today I sit here a totally different person.  I have learned so much from our bundle of joy.  I sit here a much more sanctified mommy.  I know what self sacrifice means a whole lot more than I did last year.  And I know what it means to love a human that can't do anything to declare his love to you.  And at times seems to dislike me very much.  

Here we are....one year later.  Drew and I's lives are so much better.  Our marriage is so much better.  We would not return to a year ago.We love raising Calvin and can't wait for more little ones made in the image of our Creator to come along.  It is a heavy task.  At times it is a frustrating and mentally draining task.  But isn't everything good hard sometimes?  It's soo worth it.  We're totally in love with our walking, babbling, loving, happy, little boy.  We stand in awe of our gracious Creator.  We don't deserve our little blessing.  But we're overjoyed for this year and we will cherish every memory.  I went into this year wanting to enjoy every moment.  And I have been blessed to stay at home and not miss one thing.  And the Lord has graciously allowed us to enjoy Calvin.  

We got home from our walk today.  What a beautiful day.  I told Calvin all about the God of the sky and how He is Calvin's Creator too.  And how much God loves Him.  And how much Mommy and Daddy pray he will surrender soon to Him.  I told him about Jesus and how I wouldn't give Cal over to anyone.  But God the Father in His infinite mercy gave His Son.  For Mommy and Daddy and for Calvin and for His unborn siblings.  And I told Him that Mommy and Daddy believe in this God just like we believe the sun rises in the morning and that we believe His so good and all satisfying.  And we pray to live this out in front of Cal his whole life.  And we pray Cal comes to believe these things too.

We got home from our wonderful walk.  I took my little blessing out of the stroller and watched him toddle around the yard.  Picking up sticks and pointing and saying "cat."  (He knows the cat is outside. But it was nowhere to be found.) He turned and said momma while clapping his hands and grinning from ear to ear. I remembered bringing him home from the hospital.  A screaming 7 pd. alien.  I remember every single new trick he has learned.  With tears streaming down my face I bent down and told Cal just how much mommy loved him and just how proud I was of him.  I just stood amazed and watched our little baby who has turned into a little pre-toddler.  The best year of our lives so far.  And I can't wait to see what the rest of our journey holds.

Thankful for...

We've had a rough couple weeks. I don't plan on writing all of my inside feelings down on the blog. Maybe in a few years.

But when push comes to shove or you're living in the valley you get thankful for things. So, in the midst of deep grief and sadness I'm thankful for...

1. Sustaining grace: Enough said. I would die without Jesus. He is my hope.

2. Sisters: I love, love my sisters (and my bros too;) I have always known I could not do life without them. But now I know it even more. They are my best buddies. They are very different and very similar. We share a bond that will never be broken. Even though I refuse to get "sistas 4 life" tatooed on my rear. I'm the one thats holding out. And I fully expect to one day be kidnapped by the crazy pair and dragged into a tatoo parlor. I have been so proud of the both of them lately and the wonderful women that they are. I have needed them so much and well they've been there. I have missed them both b/c I'm the freak that lives the farthest away.

3. Hubbies- I love mine. He's my bestest bud and he gets me. He's a servant. He lives life with me, even the hard parts. I also love my sissies hubbies. They are just what they need. I'm so thankful we have great hubbies.

4. Chocolate- Yes, I have eaten much of it lately. I LOVE chocolate. It's good for the soul.

5. My baby that's sleeped trained. Disagree with me all you want. Go ahead. Sleep training has been such a blessing. I can leave Cal and I know he will fall asleep for Godzilla if he had to. He has slept in so many places lately. It has been a blessing. I'm so thankful I did sleep training. We all got good sleep even in weird places. It makes grief much easier. And now that he has RSV (another post, another time) I'm even more thankful. He is only waking up once for a breathing treatment and then going back to sleep at night (thank you Lord.) Sleep is good.

6. Cooking- I LOVE cooking. I have tried applesauce bread this week. All whole wheat made with honey no white anything. YUMMY. We ate the whole loaf. Cooking is good.

7. PJ's. With RSV we don't go anywhere. I'm well aware that there could be a chronic lung patient the next aisle over in Target. So, Cal has been confined to the house. Well, one walk. And when a little girl was coming to touch the "baby." I calmly looked at her mom and said "he has rsv." which is similiar to announcing that your child has the plague. Pj's are wonderful.

8. Laughter- I think I realize the goodness of laughter even more everyday. Life is funny. Life is hard. Laugh. To prove my point. I was trying to clean this nasty house with my RSV infant following behind me or really tugging at my leg and babbling bye, bye momma, momma. So, he finally seemed busy with one of his toys (or so I thought.) I had just gotten done cleaning our bedroom and came back into the living room and found my sweet child with chocolate all over his face licking the spoon that Drew had "forgotten" to take to the dishwasher last night after he had eaten his chocolate chip cookies. Cal gave me a big grin as if to say "MMM chocalate is good, please don't spank me." I laughed my face off, picked Cal up, washed his face. (Calvin did not think it was funny when I took the yummy spoon away.)

9. Law and oder SVU-good show. I have to be careful b/c I can get freaked out.

Cal's turning one soon....wow!

Almost 9 months:)

I was at a birthday party for a little boy that I just love at our church when another mom looked at me and said "You'll be doing this soon."  I've been thinking today about the past 9 months and how fast they have flown by.  I think I have learned a few things.  Like everything we do in life, I love the way we have done some things and I will do some things differently if/when God gives us another little blessing.

THINGS I ABSOLUTELY WOULD NOT CHANGE:

1.  Having a baby young.  We love being young parents.  We got lots of rude comments when pregnant.  "Wow. That was fast." "You didn't have much time together."  "Babies make everything harder."  ETC.!!!!  We have found none of these to be true.  We're still very in love, love being parents, take time out to just spend together.  WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY LOVED BEING YOUNG PARENTS!!!!!  I'm a proud 23 year old with a cute little 9 month old.  It's what God had for us and we're so thankful.

2.  Babywise.  I'm not a babywise freak.  I have many wonderful friends who do things differently.  I'm really into doing what's best for you and your baby.  For me and mine we will always have a schedule.  I work on a schedule.  I found my little man does too.

3.  Living in the moment.  I feel looking back that for the most part we have done this well.  We have really enjoyed Cal this year.  Every new step we have both been there for, gooing at our little man hand in hand.  I'm so thankful that the Lord has allowed us to really enjoy him this far.  

4.  Reserving time for family.  Drew is bi-vocational.  It gets hard.  Saturdays for the most part are our day.  Night time we spend it together.  We do very little actually at night.  I cook dinner, we eat together, we hang out and watch some movies.  We do hang out with friends, church family, but we keep the 3 of us at at the highest priority.

5.  Asking your spouse for help.  I'm madly in love with Drew and he's a GREAT dad.  We do things together.  Even if it's at 3 in the morning with a sick baby.  We're both up, taking care of the squeak, encouraging the other one.  We have found the Lord is gracious by giving one of us the strength and piece of mind to stay sane.  

6.  Calvin- We couldn't have asked for a better baby:)  We sometimes tear up just by looking at him.  He has been the greatest blessing.  He has opened so many doors for the gospel.  And he has helped us to combat horrible abortion in Louisville.  

7.  Being a stay at home mom.  We don't drive the nicest car and we don't eat out every night.  It's not easy or luck.  It's hard.  We coupon, shop sales, I cook 6 nights a week, Drew always packs his lunch.  BUT it's all worth it.  It was our choice.  I love staying in my pj's most days.  I would not change this for the world.  Thank you Lord for providing Drew a job where I can stay home.

THINGS I'LL DO DIFFERENTLY NEXT TIME AROUND (NO I'M NOT PREGNANT, BUT HOPEFULLY, IT WON'T BE TOO LONG.)

1.  Breathe-  The first two weeks of mothering are well....exhausting.  My journals these first two week don't even makes sense.  Next time I hope to breathe more.  And realize I will once again sleep.

2.  Cuddle up that baby in the middle of the night/Cherish the 3 am feeding.  THe 3 am feeding was my prayer time.  It was sweet.  I read lots of Scripture.  I felt carried by our gracious Lord.  I hope to enjoy this more next time around.  And I miss cuddling Calvin.  This was really the only time he would really cuddle up and I miss it.

3.  Get used to the crying- It's the way babies talk.  I'm pretty used to it now.  And I hope to stay that way.  So, the babies crying...it will stop.  The baby  will fall asleep and if not turn the music up loud and have a dance party.  Drew and I have often turned up the music and laughed.  

4.  Don't freak out about a missed nap.  The grocery store is a must, people will stop by and be loud, etc.  I've become a lot more laid back (okay, sometimes I still freak out).  I hope to stay laid back and understand the big picture.

5.  More date nights.  Drew and I have always loved staying home.  We've only been out by ourselves like 3 times since the baby has been born.  Hopefully, I can let the next one out of my sight a little more.

6.  BE MORE BLUNT ABOUT RUDE COMMENTS-  I usually just smile when people say something about the blessing children are.  No, I'm not planning on having 20.  YES, I love children.  Yes, he cries.  Yes, I plan to have more.  No, I don't know how many.  Yes, we use birth control sometimes.  Yes, I HATE ABORTION.  No, I don't care about over-population.  No, I haven't figured out how to put another baby in our 2 bedroom apartment.  Yes, I trust Jesus and know he'll tell me when my child bearing years are finished...I don't know what this means.  We're still figuring it out.  I don't think two is the perfect number nor do I think 20 is.  Leave us alone:)  But just to put you at rest we plan on having 5.4 children in the next 10.4 years.  

7.  Help other mommas out more and be more compassionate about infertility.  Enough said.

Thanks for reading.  It's our 9 months in review.  I will try not to be the teary mom on his first birthday.  I STINKIN LOVE THIS CHILD!!!!!!!!

Baby on speed

Many of you who have meet my little man know that he's well...a bit active (too say the least!)  Somedays I think he might kill me.  I do enjoy him being active.  He's so fun.  I can chase him all day and he always laughs really hard.  BUT I can not leave him alone for 1 second.  If I did he would probably tear the house down.    Let's just take a trip down his progression of activity levels.  

1 day old-holding up his head.  Not kidding.  He would also turn his head sharply at any small sound.  

9 weeks old- He rolled.  Not once. He kept rolling.  He would take him awhile, but he would roll.

12 weeks- rolling both sides.  Rolling to get things now:) 

I can't remember when he sat up..but it was early.

6 months, 1 day.  Crawling...everywhere:)

6 months, 3 weeks- pulling up to his feet.

8 months-(which would be now).  Into everything.  Hitting his head constantly.  I call him puppy...his always at my feet.  When he's hungry he babbles "mommma" and crawls to me.  He's such a momma's boy.  I walk out of the room and he cries.  He goes crazy during his independent play time.  Which I have to admit is pretty cute;)

My son is a ham and he's crazy.

1.  He has called 911.  At like 6 months old.  He finds Drew's phone and I'm guessing he hold down 9.  The emergency response calls us back.

2.  While walking past a little old lady with white hair.  He decides to reach out and grab to her hair.  She starts screaming ouch and I look behind me and Cal is pulling her with us by her hair.  After this day I started pulling his hair when he pulled mine.

And many, many other things.  The kid is insane, a great sleeper, loves his momma and dada, is smiley, has SO much personality, loads of fun.  When I lay my head down at night...I've had a run for my money.

I love this kid....and I love him growing up...I love watching him change and his sweet personality coming out more and more each day.